23 August 2007

you're so muderous.

i awoke at 6:30am, almost in tears. definately afraid. as i may have mentioned before, i lost my mother exactly three years ago last sunday to breast cancer...but anyway, i had a nightmare last night that i lost my dad too. it wasn't to sickness though....he was shot. murdered. and i witnessed it. the scary thing is just a few years before my mother was even diagnosed [about 10yrs ago or so...] i had a dream that there was a driveby shooting [we live in a very nice neighborhood too ironically] and my mother was the only one who was shot. this frightens me. a lot. these past few years have been really rough between my father and i, especially when i moved out for a year. however, this past year [since i've moved back in] my relationship has strengthened almost 100%. one of the scariest parts of the nightmare was where i ended up having to care for my 3 younger siblings. it was honestly devastating. thank god it was only a nightmare.

i went to boston yesterday. i have been so busy since then i havent been able to get my pictures [yes, yes...almost 800 of them-no lie!] in order....ill try to post some later.

i am exhausted...



Anonymous said...

i have had dreams like that too. almost exactly.. its really scary when they feel real, its a relief to wake up and realize is was a bad dream!

lost teeth said...

that is horrible and i am sorry! dreams feel so real sometimes and it is terrifying. my mother always told me when you dream of losing your teeth, or of them falling out, it means someone is going to die in real life. that's where my name comes from and that is my worst nightmare.
chin up :)